You know a dream is like a river
Ever changin’ as it flows
And a dreamer’s just a vessel
That must follow where it goes
Trying to learn from what’s behind you
And never knowing what’s in store
Makes each day a constant battle
Just to stay between the shores
And I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I’ll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry
Too many times we stand aside
And let the waters slip away
‘Til what we put off ’til tomorrow
It has now become today
So don’t you sit upon the shoreline
And say you’re satisfied
Choose to chance the rapids
And dare to dance that tide
And I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I’ll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry
There’s bound to be rough waters
And I know I’ll take soome falls
With the good Lord as my captain
I can make it through them all
And I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I’ll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry

In the last month or so, I’ve had some experiences that have led me to do some thinking.  People in the lifestyle who know me, know that I currently see myself as a masochist.  I enjoy letting certain people inflict various types of pain on me.  I’m still in the process of figuring out just what I enjoy and don’t.  Since I’ve moved to Australia, thanks to being in smaller towns only, I’ve been unable to indulge my proclivities.  All that changed in December.

The first of the three experiences that relate together and to this article is watching a TV program.  I don’t recall the name, but it was a look at prostitution, as practiced in various places in the world.  The key points that I took from the program was that even in places where it is legal, the attitude towards women who work in the sex industry is pretty bad.  They’re viewed as somehow being lesser people, soiled, if you will.  In fact, it seemed like women who chose to do it legally were looked down on more so than those who found themselves in the profession by force or lack of options.  Read more…

I will never forget the first time I was told that I was going to stimulate M’s prostate. He had done some reading on the subject, and when he learned how great the orgasms could be, he told me that I was going to be taking care of him. Of course, the first couple of times were awkward, and I was properly punished for failing, but he definitely enjoyed the experience. With a little bit of time I had learned how to use my fingers to stimulate the prostate while providing oral. But after a while, he realized that he wanted to improve the experience even more. Read more…

The past month or so has been insane. There’s really no other way to describe it. And over all, pretty spectacular.

A producer at a local radio station approached me on Twitter about blogging on their website. I’m probably jinxing it just by mentioning it. But you know what? Even if they decided to go with someone else, or not to do the column at all, just the fact that a local radio station approached me about a sex column on their website is awesome. And hey, if they decided to go with someone else, at least I gave them the idea, eh? But I start this week on a trial basis. Should be interesting to say the least.

It happened completely by accident. The concert we went to was so phenomenal an experience that I ran to Twitter, as I usually do, to let everyone know. It’s not often we have an experience like that. We’re so often working or broke. And how many awesome experiences have you had in public that only cost $30? After tweeting to my followers, I dropped an @ to the radio station to tell them we had an awesome time.  Read more…

M’s fucking with my head, I think. It’s hard to tell with him. He’s so good at it that sometimes what seems like an ordinary interaction on the surface is really a gentle push in the direction of a trap he’s set for me somewhere in my mind. Hell, just the fact that I know that is half the fun. It keeps me on my toes. Always aware of my surroundings. Constantly questioning his motives. In my mind and while obeying him if he’s telling me to do something. Most of the time. I still have a bad habit of asking why he wants me to do something if I can’t figure out a single logical reason for it or if I think there’s a better way of doing what I think he wants accomplished.

Once in awhile, my inability to see the point (as if it matters at all what the point is) is caused by me trying to guess his motives and missing the mark. Most often it’s just that I’ve misunderstood him. Though we both only speak English, we learned the language in different areas, at different times, from different people with different heritages. And he’s a tech geek. You wouldn’t think it would matter, but sometimes it does.  Read more…

Wow. Nine years. Nine YEARS! Before M, I couldn’t keep a relationship going for nine MONTHS, much less nine YEARS. Yet, here we are, happier than ever, celebrating nine years of marriage and planning a vow renewal ceremony, complete with family and the pretty dress, to celebrate ten.

We’ve been up. We’ve been down. We’ve changed. We’ve grown. Together.

We’re better right now than we ever were.

Happy anniversary, my master. I love you more than life.

via EdenTube on EdenFantasys

“Come on, bitch. Let’s see if we can fuck the stupid out of you.” he said as he fisted his hand in my hair and pulled me to my feet.

I giggled nervously. Not half an hour before, I’d told him I get to choose what pussy we take home.

Okay, what I really said was, “But don’t I have a right to at least like it?”

And what he said was, “Not if I don’t allow it and you fucking know it.”

And then that was that. He asked me what was wrong a couple times. But mostly we just finished up what we were doing, and went about our business. He teased me. I pretended to ignore him. And then he decided to fuck the stupid out of me.

I do so love to poke the sadist.  Read more…

This ain’t a song for the broken-hearted
No silent prayer for the faith-departed
I ain’t gonna be just a face in the crowd
You’re gonna hear my voice
When I shout it out loud

It’s my life
It’s now or never
I ain’t gonna live forever
I just want to live while I’m alive
(It’s my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just wanna live while I’m alive
It’s my life

This is for the ones who stood their ground
For Tommy and Gina who never backed down
Tomorrow’s getting harder make no mistake
Luck ain’t even lucky
Got to make your own breaks

It’s my life
And it’s now or never
I ain’t gonna live forever
I just want to live while I’m alive
(It’s my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just want to live while I’m alive
‘Cause it’s my life

Better stand tall when they’re calling you out
Don’t bend, don’t break, baby, don’t back down

It’s my life
And it’s now or never
‘Cause I ain’t gonna live forever
I just want to live while I’m alive
(It’s my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just want to live while I’m alive

It’s my life
And it’s now or never
‘Cause I ain’t gonna live forever
I just want to live while I’m alive
(It’s my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just want to live while I’m alive
‘Cause it’s my life!

This weekend fucking rocked.

On Thanksgiving, we hung out at the house. He cooked most of the meal, but I helped some. Of course, I made the cranberry sauce. He teased me all. fucking. day. Such a tease. But there’s not much better in the world than being teased. Except cooking with your lover while drinking some really amazing Sangria.

We watched football. M’s not really a sports guy. He used to watch football and play some football game on Play Station with a friend of His, but He’s never really been a die-hard fan.

I love football. I was raised on football. My dad’s a die-hard Cowboys fan from Texas. I spent a good bit of time in NOLA. Who dat?!  Read more…