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Archive for August 1st, 2010

Letter 1: A deceased person I wish I could talk to

August 1st, 2010 2 comments

Dear Mom,

It’s been twenty-eight years since the last time I saw you.  At least ten since the last time I visited your grave.  Time and money never seem to allow for a trip.  I know that’s partly my fault.

I often wonder if you’re out there, watching over me.  If it’s you who makes sure that when I get myself in trouble, I come out mostly okay.  If you’re disappointed in me.

I know that if you still exist, you love me.  That’s the one thing everyone always made sure to assure me of.  Even your rotten sister.  Read more…

Thirty Letters in Thirty Days

August 1st, 2010 2 comments

… Or not.  We’ll see, I guess.

I know… I know… Everyone’s doing it.  And at first, when I saw it, I wasn’t going to do it.  I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, and there’s still a lot of stuff I keep to myself.  Just the thought of putting everything out there makes me feel a little squicked out.

I’ve been talking to M and a few of my friends about the situation with my parents, and my sister, and my past, and… And it’s becoming more and more apparent that I really just need to get the poison that is driving me crazy out of my system, even if they never see/hear it.  So I’ve decided that if there’s anything too personal, or something I don’t feel belongs here, I’ll just make it private.  Read more…