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Emotional train wreck? Where??

September 27th, 2010 Comments off

Dear Cabbie, "With groceries" is my polite way of saying, "Get here before my burgers thaw."

I’ve got a bit of entitlement syndrome going on, lately.  You’d think a person who has so little would learn to appreciate what they have, rather than develop the belief that they’re entitled to something more.

For example, the most heard phrase in this house, of late, is “Did you really have to be nasty about it?” Out of my mouth, not M’s.  Though both of us have taken to snapping rather than speaking when we get frustrated or annoyed.  Chalk it up to the financial stress we’re under, and my new found hatred of SEO.  Because it is imperative one hate something one does not understand!

Somewhere along the line, I got the impression that I’m not allowed to have an opinion, or emotions, or get annoyed, or… Not in our relationship, but in life in general.  Probably because I’ve always responded to negative emotions with screaming, and rather than help me develop better coping mechanisms, my mother would just let me scream, and send me on my way when I was finished without helping me “fix”, for lack of a better word, my problem, and my father would refuse to listen to me until I calmed down.  But even as a child, I’d get so worked up that I couldn’t calm down, and things weren’t making sense.   Read more…

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