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30 Days of Kink: Define Your Kinky Self by TitsMcScandal

From The Upper Floor by Kink.com

Rayne’s been bugging everyone for a guest post defining their kinky selves for the writing project Thirty Days of Kink. Next up, TitsMcScandal from The Blogging Slave.

From TitsMcScandal’s bio: I’m a 19 year old who has always been obsessed with sex.  I’m a kinky slave girl.  I have also been passionate about sharing my knowledge and experiences.  It is a natural progression then to have this blog.

To define my kinky self, I think a look back at where I began explains a lot of it.  I was in an abusive relationship.  The guy I was with controlled a lot of what I did and punished me if I did something wrong.  Of course, because he was plain ole sadistic, he would punish me if I didn’t do something wrong too.  Many people ask me now why I didn’t leave when I knew what was happening was wrong.  It is because I got off on the pain that was being given to me.  Plus, when he controlled me (by telling me what to wear or eat) it sent immediate shivers downward.  Not to mention, the sex was fantastic.  It was the first time I ever had done a consensual nonconsent scene.  Granted, I didn’t know that it was called a ‘scene’ then, nor did I know that what we were experimenting with had a whole community out there that would have been able to harness what we were doing into something healthier and safer. 

That relationship definitely led to my exploration of my kinky self.  A lot of what turned my cranks in that relationship still apply to this day, including control and pain.  However my kink base has expanded one million percent since that time.  I actually now know there is such a thing as kink and I’ve been able to explore my kinky side with experienced and fun partners.  I’ve been able to learn so much about kink online with great websites like FetLife.  I’ve been able to meet fellow kinksters in my community by going to munches and play parties.  You might wonder what this has to do with anything, but I think this is really important; because I consider myself to be an inquisitive kinkster.  There are tons of things out there that I have learned or heard about from others that have been added to my list of things I want to try- like knife play.

I think that alone demonstrates that I devour every kind of kink experience that I can.  There are some I don’t have a high interest in (like needle play) and others that I have tried and decided just aren’t the right thing for me (like chastity).  But I have tried them.  Lucky for me I have stumbled upon some great things that are constant in my kink repertoire because of my exploration, choking, exhibitionism, face slapping, kneeling, bondage, among many other great things.

I find myself on the bottom end of the spectrum.  I’ve been a sub and a slave.  I’ve been a plain ole bottom.  I’ve explored that end and have found contentment and happiness.  I feel like it is where I fit and belong.  However I have been exploring (as I said it is in my nature) some topping acts as well recently.  I did my first scene with an adorable friend about two months ago as a top to her luscious bottom (oh, a pun!).  While it is not something that I crave or feel is something that has a true calling for me, it doesn’t mean that I don’t get enjoyment out of it.  I’ve been planning a night for November at a play party where I will have a ‘pet’ for the evening.  Planning the night has become a source of excitement for me.  I know I will have fun.  I struggled at first thinking that it made me less of a good sub/slave than I was before.  But now I realize that they can exist in completely separate realms.  I belong in my position as a sub/slave/bottom, whenever I top it is just a fun little vacation.

None of this would have been discovered for me if I wasn’t as curious as I am.  I desire all different types of play and experiences because variety is the spice of life.  I like trying new and different things inside and outside of the bedroom.  That’s who my kinky self is.  Just me.  TitsMcScandal.

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