30DoK: Define Your Kinky Self by SeaofNeptune
From Neptune’s bio: I’m a beginner toy reviewer/blogger and a current college student. I live with a super awesome boyfriend and I am currently just trying to enjoy life.
Day 1: Dom, sub, switch? What parts of BDSM interest you? Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.
Hi, my name is Neptune and I love all things kinky. I’m still a novice and I have been exploring this side of my sexuality for a bit of time now. My partner and I are still exploring and experimenting with each other, so right now we switch between the dominant and submissive roles. I am sure that he and I will continue to do so until we settle in our preferred role. For some reason, I tend to feel awkward being the Dom, but it always depends on my mood. When I think about being the Dom and planning things, I always shrink and become shy – but when it’s more in the heat of the moment, I have no issue. I don’t know why that is, I guess I just feel like the spotlight is shining on me and I freeze. Part of the reason I feel that being submissive is easier for me is because I am naturally dominant in regular life. I have a dominant personality; I am strong and willing to take control of everyday situations without an issue. So, I guess that I enjoy giving that up and having someone else take control. To make my decisions for me and tell me what needs to be done. The same may go for my partner as well, he is naturally laid back and willing to go with the flow. So I am sure he enjoys getting the chance to be fully in control for once.
When we first delved into the world, it was mainly bondage only. I think I always had a thing for bondage growing up. I was thrilled when I managed to talk my partner into tying me up for the first time. So from there we went from using whatever we had in the house to purchasing actual restraints. I have some lovely wrist, ankle, and thigh cuffs. Then I got into spanking out of nowhere, it happened when my partner slapped my butt in the middle of sex. My brain said to me “What’s this!? I want more.” So after that, I purchased my first paddle – which then led to a riding crop and then a flogger. Oh, and somewhere in there I got my first pair of nipple clamps because I love having my nipples stimulated like that. I even purchased books of BDSM related erotica that we lay in bed together and read to help get us in the mood from time to time.
My partner and I are not 24/7 in the roles, we have our everyday life and then we fall into the roles at other times. Due to this, we unfortunately don’t have a whole lot of time to focus on kink these days. We recently moved into our own home, we both work and go to college. So we don’t have a whole lot of time to pull out the kinky fun toys. So for me, when we do get to be kinky – it’s like a dessert for me. You know that special treat that you have been waiting to give yourself all day. That’s what it becomes like for me and I enjoy it so much more because I don’t have the luxury all the time.
So this is me, the novice and lover of kinky things. We are still experimenting and I am looking forward to where we may end up.