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30 Days of Kink: How open?

May 22nd, 2015 No comments

30 Days of KinkFor the rest of this series, and links to others who have participated, click here.

How open are you about your kinks?

It really depends on what we’re talking about.

So like, my family knows I’m kinky. Not because I’ve ever sat down and discussed it with them, though. I’m just not very good at hiding things that I don’t think should have to be hidden. I mean, really, what difference does my sex life make to them? They don’t have to have sex with me, or sit in my bedroom while I’m having sex.

My sister knows about my website and has read some of it. We’ve talked about my ‘sordid’ past, and my current relationship. I think what it comes down to is I wanted someone in my family to know I’m happy and taken care of in my current relationship without having to be careful of the things I said. But it’s very clear she doesn’t get it. Which is fine. Some seasoned kinksters don’t get my relationship, so I didn’t expect her to. Read more…

30 Days of Kink: Kink the Reality v. Kink the Fantasy

March 11th, 2015 No comments

30 Days of KinkFor the rest of this series, and links to others who have participated, click here.

How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?

These days I shy away from this question because I don’t like to step all over anyone else’s lifestyle. I mean, there are some things that are never going to be attainable for M and me that other people incorporate into their daily lives without breaking a sweat. That’s just the way life works. So instead of trying to define kinky reality and kinky fantasy for everyone (which would force me to talk out my ass more than usual), I’m just going to discuss what the differences have been for me. Read more…

30 Day of Kink: Kink In the Vanilla World

March 3rd, 2015 2 comments

30 Days of KinkFor the rest of this series, and links to others who have participated, click here.

Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?

I dunno if I’ve ever told this story. Huh. Seems I’ve been holding more to my breast than I’ve realized.

M’s a bit of an exhibitionist. I am, too, but I don’t get to pick when I get to be an exhibitionist. M does.

We’re also both huge nature enthusiasts. We love hiking, camping, fishing…if we can do it outside, we probably love it. Except baseball…M hates baseball. Which sucks for me because I fucking LOVE baseball.

Anyway… Read more…

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30 Days of Kink: “Anonymous” Defines Their Kinky Self

June 12th, 2014 No comments

30 Days of KinkFor the Cheer Melen Up Without Hurting His Back Giveaway, we offered bonus entries for the social media prize to people who defined their kinky selves for the 30 Days of Kink project. Here’s an anonymous entry we received. We love it.

Discovering my kinky self is going hand in hand with discovering my sexual self. In fact, a big part of discovering my sexuality has been realizing that I’m a bit kinky. It’s possible that these things will change as I learn and experience more, but thus far these things define my kinky self.

1) My kinky self is conflicted. Read more…

30 Days of Kink: Difficulty In Living Kinky

April 24th, 2014 1 comment

30 Days of KinkFor the rest of this series, and links to others who have participated, click here.

Day 16: What are the most difficult aspects of having a sexuality that involves kink or BDSM for you personally?

1 — So we all know I struggle with mental health issues, right? I think this is one of the biggest obstacles that consistently pops up in our journey.

I am unmedicated and do not see a therapist. Therapy never worked for me. It’s been suggested that this could be partially due to the fact that therapy was always forced. That makes a certain kind of sense. It can’t work if you don’t let it, and I most certainly was not interested in it working some of the times I was in therapy. I wasn’t ready to heal; better to bury it. But there are other issues that come with seeing a therapist when you’re in an owner/property relationship.

People still believe that no woman could ever enjoy living the type of lifestyle I have chosen for myself. I’m regularly accused of “setting the feminist movement back” 50 years, and making light of other people who were enslaved against their will. People have told me I’m not really a strong woman who has chosen a BDSM relationship, but rather, a weak woman who can’t stand up for herself and pretends to be strong. Read more…

30 Days of Kink: List your kinks. by @AlisonTyler

February 15th, 2014 No comments

Delicious Torment by Alison TylerList your kinks.

Let’s put our cards down on the table: I hate filling out forms. But your list is so much fun, I want to answer more than one. (Oh, god. I rhymed.)

The truth is that I have one major kink—the one that defines me as much as my brown eyes, or my silver-streaked hair, or my too-wide smile. I am a voyeur’s voyeur. I want to know everything. Not only about how lovers behave in the bedroom—but beyond. I want to know what’s in your purse, on your bookshelf, in your back pocket. I pay attention to bits of conversation (yeah, it’s called eavesdropping). I unintentionally snoop all the time.

This particular kink has lead to many others. I mean, because I like to watch—because I want to see—I also want to experience other people’s kinks and fetishes. Read more…