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Posts Tagged ‘domination’

NS(K)Q: Q52: He Wants the Gift of Submission

July 17th, 2015 No comments

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 52:

My longterm boyfriend recently discovered Fifty Shades of Grey. (You’re rolling your eyes so hard I can hear them. Stop it.) I pointed him to this video, and suggested that he do more research, and now he’s talking about ‘the gift of submission’, and how awesome it would be if I could find it within myself to give him that gift. I’m all about kinky sex, but I don’t think I’m cut out for submission. What do I do?

Well, first of all, it sounds like your boyfriend is still taking his cues from Christian Grey. Check out this post on Upworthy.com to see what I mean.

BDSM is not about being coerced into being something you’re not1. Consent can not be coerced or forced. I can’t express this enough. Read more…

Kinktionary: Power Exchange

July 17th, 2015 No comments

found here

found here

Power exchange is exactly what it sounds like. Person A gives a little or a lot of power over their body, or life, or mind (or any combination of the three) to Person B. In exchange, (and in the most simply put way possible because there are thousands of services Person A and Person B provide each other) Person B agrees to keep Person A safe while controlling the things Person A has given them power over.

This can look different from relationship to relationship. The levels of control Person A is willing to give up varies greatly, person to person. Some people allow their partners to control everything, from what they wear to how they speak to where they’re allowed to go. Other people only allow their partners to control things that happen in the bedroom. As with most things in BDSM, it all comes down to consent and the needs and desires of the people involved.

Got a suggestion for our Kinktionary? Leave it in comments or email it to rayne@insatiabledesire.com with “Kinktionary” in the subject!

Kinktionary: Safe Word

July 3rd, 2015 No comments

safe-wordThe need for a safe word is a matter of debate around the kink forums. Some are vehemently against them, while others adamantly insist that people shouldn’t play without a safe word.

A ‘safe word’ is a word assigned to a bottom in a BDSM play session. This word is meant to be used if the bottom wants something in the scene to stop, for whatever reason, and, as such, should be a word that the bottom wouldn’t normally use while playing.

Once a safe word is spoken, everything should stop until the bottom’s issue is resolved (or completely if the bottom has reached their limit). A safe word, when used during a scene, should never, ever be ignored. A person should never be coerced into going beyond their safe word if they’re not comfortable with that. And a person should never feel ashamed or embarrassed for using their safe word.

Anything can be a safe word. Some people come up with the most ridiculous word they can think of, while others use what’s called the ‘stoplight’ system.

As you would expect, with the stoplight system, green means, “Things are good! Keep going!” Yellow means “I don’t necessarily want to stop, but something’s off.” And red means, “For the love of God, stop what you’re doing right the fuck now.” Read more…

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NS(K)Q: Q50 – Master doesn’t like my fetish.

June 19th, 2015 No comments

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 50:

There’s this thing that I need to be fully satisfied. My master is not at all into it. In fact, it kind of disgusts him. He loves me and doesn’t want to give me up, and I’m not interested in going anywhere, either. I don’t know what to do. HALP!

That’s a tough situation.

Some folks in the lifestyle would tell you it’s just tough all around. Many believe a slave’s purpose is to serve and please their owner without the expectation of being fulfilled in return. These people would say slaves don’t have a specific right or entitlement to wish fulfillment. Any fulfillment allowed by their owner should be considered a gift and cherished as such. Read more…

I’m always going to get mine.

June 16th, 2015 1 comment

My stomach sank when he said it.

I was on my knees in front of him. His beautiful cock was buried deep in my throat. His hands were fisted in my hair. And my mind was going a mile a minute, trying to figure out what I’d done wrong.

“You’re supposed to be a teasy slut,” he said. “Did you forget how to turn me on?”

My blood ran cold. He’d come to me, naked, fresh from the shower. His hands had found my tits, and I had given a half hearted lick to his stomach, my hands in my lap, as if I had no god damned sense in my head.

“Don’t you think your hand should be on that when it’s that close?” he had asked.

I had grinned sheepishly and wrapped my hand around his cock, but I definitely had lacked that certain something that says, “This is what I want to be doing.”

That’s no bueno. Read more…

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Now I’m going to do whatever I want with you.

June 15th, 2015 No comments

“I think you should go figure out a way to lay on the bed with your ass in the air without hurting your shoulder.”

It almost sounds like a suggestion, or even a request, but it was neither.

I wound my hair up into a sloppy bun and pinned it in place before making my way to the bedroom. The Wedge was already out, so getting into position simply meant putting it in the middle of the bed and kneeling over it. I pulled my pillows over, too, to help support my upper body so that all my weight wasn’t resting on my shoulders, and snuggled in.

He took his sweet time joining me. Anticipation is a motherfucker. And as I knelt there, my ass lifted and thighs spread, I could feel it building in my stomach. Which, of course, translated to slippery heat building in my cunt. Read more…