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Posts Tagged ‘power exchange’

Kinktionary: Power Exchange

July 17th, 2015 Comments off

found here

found here

Power exchange is exactly what it sounds like. Person A gives a little or a lot of power over their body, or life, or mind (or any combination of the three) to Person B. In exchange, (and in the most simply put way possible because there are thousands of services Person A and Person B provide each other) Person B agrees to keep Person A safe while controlling the things Person A has given them power over.

This can look different from relationship to relationship. The levels of control Person A is willing to give up varies greatly, person to person. Some people allow their partners to control everything, from what they wear to how they speak to where they’re allowed to go. Other people only allow their partners to control things that happen in the bedroom. As with most things in BDSM, it all comes down to consent and the needs and desires of the people involved.

Got a suggestion for our Kinktionary? Leave it in comments or email it to rayne@insatiabledesire.com with “Kinktionary” in the subject!

NS(K)Q: Q40 – How To Ask For A Collar

November 13th, 2014 Comments off

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 40:

Okay so you explained what a collar is, but how do I ask for one?

So it’s like this:

(I may say that a little too often…oh well.)

Different people have different expectations.

In the years I’ve been running around the web, I’ve heard of so many different ways of doing this. For some, it’s the submissive’s responsibility to ask to be collared, and the dominant decides if this is appropriate. For others, the submissive should somehow make her desire known, but the one who does the asking is the dominant. And for still others, no one asks. The collar just goes round the neck. Read more…

A Conversation About Fear and Spoiled Slaves

March 4th, 2014 5 comments

CollarOn Saturday, we went for a drive.

Master was going to head out to Vischer Ferry so we could take pictures along the Old Erie Canal. I said, “I was going to bring my camera, and then I decided not to.”

“Well,” he said, “I was thinking about stopping at Walmart so we can pick up one of those binoculars-slash-digital-camera things we were talking about getting.”

“That’d be great. I forgot to bring tampons, and I have to pee.”

He glared at me, and launched his usual tirade about me forgetting something so crucial to our being able to stay out a while. In truth, my uterus is being a finicky bitch (as she is wont to do), and I only have my period every other twenty-four hours. Saturday was an other day, but you can never be too sure. I told him that, but he wanted those binoculars, so we went. Read more…

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So, Uh…About Aunt Flo…

February 25th, 2014 3 comments

M and me making faces“So, uh…shouldn’t you be bleeding by now?”

“Mayyyybe.” In truth, I don’t know. I stopped keeping track of my period the day my tubes were tied. I mean, I always have an estimated idea of when my next one is due, but since my last child, my period has never really been exact, and I finally just gave up worrying about whether or not I was pregnant because I haven’t gotten pregnant in thirteen years.

I mean, I know it’s been a few weeks. But has it been three or four? I dunno! Every once in a while, my cycle falls around the sixth of the month. Other times, it falls around the fifteenth. Which is it now? I don’t know!

“I feel like you should be bleeding by now.”

“Well…yesterday my back was killing me. Today my boobs hurt. My stomach’s fucked up and I can’t sleep. So maybe soon?”

“Yeah…uh…”

“Or maybe I’m pregnant,” I said sardonically.

“No babies! No babies! No babies!” he yelled, in his best game show voice.

“Yeah, that’s one abortion I’ll pay for,” I reply.

“You’ll do what I tell you,” he retorts. “So just don’t get pregnant.”

P.S. This is mostly a joke. Yes, I was a little late, but we’re talking days, not weeks, and M and me were mostly just fucking with each other.

P.P.S I started my period later that day. No babies!

I feel pretty…oh, so pretty…

January 10th, 2014 8 comments

imageSo last night, I dyed my hair.

I was supposed to wait till Master felt like helping me (or had the time…lately, it’s more that he doesn’t have time for anything), but I got tired of waiting. I wanted it done already. So in anticipation of the mess I was going to make, I covered the bathroom with garbage bags, mixed up a couple bags of henna-based, all natural dye, and went to town.

I used this color the last time I dyed my hair, but my hair was longer, and chemically treated in some places, and much, much more damaged. At the time, I was using Suave shampoo and conditioner because we couldn’t afford something good for my hair, so my hair was super dry. Plus, I followed directions on the internet rather than directions on the package. Over all, it was a giant recipe for disaster, and it didn’t come out quite how I wanted it, and…yeah.

Oh, did I not mention I cut my hair? I can’t remember. I mean, if you follow me on Twitter, you know, because I practically live-tweeted that shit. I was super nervous about it. Partly because the girl took off 2 1/2 feet, but mostly, I was nervous about the bangs. I haven’t had bangs since middle school, and back then, we cut a very thin layer of bangs straight across just under the brow line, rolled them under with a curling iron, and then sprayed the shit out of them so that they didn’t lose their curl. Ahh…the 90s. Read more…

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No Stupid (Kink) Questions: Episode 16 – You’re the master!

September 16th, 2013 Comments off

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 16:

I’ve got this slave. I love it more than anything, and I’d love to keep it around. But it keeps ignoring the rules. I mean, I’m the owner. Shouldn’t my slave be doing at least some of what I say?

Disclaimer: I wrote this post for EdenCafe around the time I started losing faith in the company. I was hella drunk, and veered off the point a bit. I will be revisiting it this week. Moral of the story: never blog kink instructions when you’re sloshed.

So I’m sitting on the couch with M when suddenly I get the urge to lick his back. I cuddle up to him, snuggle my face between his back and the cushions and begin to lick and nip and kiss.

“That’s no fair.” he says.

“What’s no fair?” I ask, innocently.

“You’re teasing!” he says.

“It is impossible for me to tease.” I say back, matter-of-factly. And he just kinda stares at me. Read more…