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Posts Tagged ‘property’

Middle School Wisdom As It Applies to BDSM

March 14th, 2016 No comments

Most of the things I learned in middle school didn’t sink in until I was an adult. Like when Mom repeatedly pointed out that if I kept things semi-organized, my day would go a lot smoother, or when Dad told us, over and over, that if we did things the right way the first time, we wouldn’t have to stop doing something fun to do them again later.

When I was a kid, me and my dad used to butt heads a lot. A LOT. I was a budding feminist, you see, and my dad is a good ol’ boy from Texas.

I actually feel kind of bad for referring to him that way. He means well. We just don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things, and especially most things political.

I can’t say for sure, but I think he’ll vote blue if the GOP puts Trump up as their nominee, so I guess there’s that. Read more…

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Top 100 Sex Bloggers 2015

March 8th, 2016 No comments

Remember Rori’s Top 100 Sex Bloggers list? Sadly, Rori’s blog (and the list) has gone on hiatus. But never fear! Molly from Molly’s Daily Kiss took up the tradition. And here’s this year’s list! Make sure you check out #21. 😛

New Voice of the Year Award

This award goes to a blog that is new this year and therefore have not been around long enough to qualify for the Top Sex Bloggers list. After much sole searching I have decided that there are two winners of this award this year.

Melina Greenport: I discovered her blog through Wicked Wednesday and have fallen increasingly in love with her sexy, intelligent, beautiful writing. Seriously, if fabulous erotic fiction is your thing then this lady is going to rock your world.

Exposing 40: Exposing 40 has launched herself into the blogging world with style, grace and passion. Her site is a body positive adventure, centred around life in your 40’s. This blog is an unashamed look at, not only her body, but both male and female guests and challenges the traditional ideals of youth = beauty/sex and I am really looking forward to seeing where this project takes her in 2016.

And now with the previews done lets launch ourselves into the main event! Read more…

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NS(K)Q: Q61 – When To Collar

February 19th, 2016 No comments

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 61:

What would be the proper time frame for from the first time you connect with someone from an online site as a potential slave or Master/Dom to becoming owners of or owned as property? Do you meet the person first, particularly if it’s a “Relocation” deal? If so, how long? I know each situation is different, but seems like dragging it out too long would be a turn-off as a Master.

Well, for starters, there’s no real “right way” to do anything in BDSM, outside of common sense safety precautions. And that goes doubly for decisions regarding your personal relationships. You have to decide what’s right for the two of you. Read more…

NS(K)Q: Q57 – What is “slave speak”?

January 15th, 2016 No comments

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 57:

My sub and I have been discussing upping the relationship ante to Master/slave. He asked me if I’d require him to speak in slave speak, and I said I don’t know. I don’t know because I have no idea what slave speak is, but I didn’t want to tell him that. So what is slave speak? And do I have to make him use it?

First of all, there are very few “have to”s in BDSM. You have to get consent from anyone you touch. You have to stay within the limits the two of you have set for each other. If you set protocols for yourself and your slave, you have to obey and enforce them. If you use a safe word or gesture, you have to stop when they’re used. If you don’t use safe words, you have to respect your partner’s “no,” or “stop.” Read more…

Kinktionary: Consent to Non-Consent

April 17th, 2015 No comments

consent-is-mandatoryIn February, we defined consent thusly:

“Consent, literally defined, is permission. In a BDSM setting, consent is the only thing separating sadomasochism from assault.

Consent is required for each and every act in a play session, sex, any touching, a relationship, collaring, setting a relationship dynamic, a change in relationship dynamic…Consent cannot be coerced or forced.

Consent in BDSM is a fluid thing, and can be revoked at any time. This means that at any point during a relationship or play session, a person (dominant, submissive, or switch) is allowed and expected to speak up when their partner delves into an area they’re not comfortable with. …” Read more…

Holy shit! I did something right. For once.

January 7th, 2015 2 comments

This red thing.

This red thing.

I was sitting at the computer, trying to catch up on JennaMarbles’ and Julien Solomita’s fuckery while M was on a conference call.

“I want you to get in the shower,” he said. I ignored him. I had no idea what he was saying. He was on a conference call. I figured he was talking to his coworkers.

“Did you hear me?”

I ignored him.

“Did you hear me?”

I ignored him.

“RAYNE!”

“Huh?”

“Did you fucking hear me?”

“Uh…no?” Read more…

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